I had a teacher in high school named Mr. Carlson. He taught Social Studies and was very fond of the past. can’t blame him really since he was sort of a relic. By the time I was in his class, he had been around forever and was on the verge of retirement. He was one of those teachers that liked to reminisce about the good old days from a sweet sepia bygone era. And he did that a lot. I would always space out during this time and picture a classroom full of blond, letter-jacket wearing boys who said stuff like “Aw shucks, Mr. C.” and were considered to be “real men.” This was quite a different landscape from where I sat then since the classroom was filled with students who could have spontaneously risen up to perform a collective rendition of “Children of the World Join Hands.” So it was quite unfortunate that I sensed that Mr. Carlson was anti-immigrant and also, yes racist. Again, he was a relic but perhaps he had overstayed his welcome a tad. I wasn’t a fan.

One thing that stands out during my class with him was the fact that there were two old desks in the front of the class draped with ribbons. No one ever sat there and they weren’t reserved for guests of honor. One didn’t have to wonder long about them since the history of The Desks was his most beloved and thus most frequently told story. The first one belonged to a young man (and I spaced out here so this is just the outline) who was a great athlete and student. The athlete part was a necessary attribute for all young men, you see, so I remember that well. One day Mr. Carlson recommended that he goes to a summer camp somewhere to do something and to make a long story short, the young man died there what was no doubt a heroic death. I couldn’t shake the irony that it was Mr. Carlson who sent him to the camp and that perhaps he should revisit the angle from which he told the story class after class, year after year. But no matter.

The second desk belonged to a young lady, which is surprising because he was also predictably sexist. However, that young lady was Hillary Rodham. Turns out she went to my high school for 3 out of her 4 years before transferring to a better one (if it was better back then, the trend certainly continued when metal detectors were installed the year after I graduated) in the same district. And Mr. Carlson was her teacher, too. He was quite fond of her not least because of the fact that she was the current First Lady. I don’t remember many Hillary stories probably because I wasn’t listening. But what I do remember is the attributes she was described with versus those letter jacket-wearing blond boys. And it’s those attributes that worry me today.

The most disconcerting part is the fact that the relic that was Mr. Carlson is very omnipresent in today’s media and its sponges (aka the rest of us) albeit in a disguised form. For instance, if I were to describe someone as opinionated, sharp as nails, “firecracker,” and similar adjectives, would I be talking about a man? Probably not. Now, I haven’t actually seen her described exactly like that but my point is that as long as those distinctions are around, we will have registered Democrats who will vote for McCain if she is the candidate in national elections. They will tell you that they have no problem with having a female candidate but just not Hillary Clinton. Oh really? Why not? Well, she’s too divisive. Or she’s too jaded in Washington politics. Or she was married to Bill Clinton. Or she’s too…whatever. Well, ok. Would you vote for a black woman, then, who was in the Senate for about year but was very charismatic and gave great speeches? If not, behind door number two we have a 74-year-old woman who tells like it is. Would you vote for her?

Well, it doesn’t matter. There is no such choice anyway. And if one was to choose based on that, they would be no better then the ignorami who voted for our last President on the grounds that he was the kind of guy they could have a beer with. I have yet to meet an average Joe who did hang out with him, by the way, but maybe there’s a lot of them and they are too embarrassed to brag about that now? There is a great article that talks about just that.

I would love to look past all that and really deconstruct their policies on the economy, the war, healthcare, social security, etc (on all of which both Clinton and Obama are strikingly similar). And I was undecided in the primaries until pretty much the point when I was standing in front of the ballot machine. But that’s just me.

Anyway, it all comes back to those damn adjectives. I didn’t even remember Mr. Carlson mentioning her impressive legal career or her healthcare plight or any of her other achievements (this was right before Monica-gate – not anyone’s brightest moment). But I do appreciate the fact that after many attempts of him asking her to come for a visit, she finally arrived at our school to give a speech. I don’t remember her being divisive and opinionated but I do remember a charismatic and powerful speaker. I wonder if Mr. Carlson would vote for her.